I'm just back from a trip home to Scotland. It was lovely seeing friends and family. Luckily I have worked out the solution to homesickness... I want to move everyone around with me wherever I go....that's not too much to ask is it?! Well perhaps not but I take solace in the fact that my relationships with the people I love and care for and choose are just as beautiful as they were when we left a year ago and I have no fear that that is going to change and that brings me tremendous happiness.
Every new year brings a huge whirl of emotions and thoughts for me. It's not just resolutions it is revaluations and I think going 'home' really helped me with that this year. Lots of people were surprised we travelled back to the UK in the first year we had moved to Australia but for me it was a given. I wanted to see my family and friends and yes it stirred up a lot of feelings & emotions for both me and my two children but I'm glad we went. Because number 1 feelings are meant to be felt and I want to teach them that. At the end of our holiday there were lots of tears thinking about leaving and coming 'home' to Australia. Leaving what we know and what gives us such comfort. We spoke about it as a family in the taxi on the way back from the airport at 3am...about how lucky we are. To have two homes. Two sets of communities. Two lots of people who care for and love us. Two 'habitats' that give us different things and fulfill our needs in different ways. It was then in than taxi that I saw it. My three year old totally 'got it' she smiled and a look came over her face which was unmistakably one of gratitude. It was really quiet and beautiful and I thought "it's ok, we're ok".
It doesn't mean we won't miss everyone, that we won't have moments when tears cloud over our eyes in a quiet moment, we will. But what I'm trying to say is if you are in a similar position to me and you struggle with how you believe yourself to be coping or how your kids are coping with the huge life turning thing you have decided that's best for everyone maybe let yourself believe that you did in fact do the right thing, and that you and they are, in fact, ok.
